Our Lesbian Wedding in Vancouver

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When we started dating at the beginning of 2011, we always knew that one day we would get married. Being Canadian, we were so fortunate to have the option of a legal wedding that would grant us all of the rights and freedoms as a heterosexual couple. The idea of marriage in the LGBTQ+ community means something different to everyone. A lot of same-sex couples aren’t able to legally marry. Some couples don’t believe in same-sex marriage. Some same-sex couples choose to commit to one another and live in a common-law partnership, without ever marrying legally. We respect everyone’s personal decisions regarding this topic, and we can understand why anyone might choose to marry, or choose not to. For us, neither of us were raised in a strict religious household, and we have never viewed marriage as a firmly religious institution. We have both always seen it as something that has evolved over time, and today it represents a modern partnership between two people who want to commit their lives to one another. The LGBTQ+ community has fought for this legal right in countries around the world, including our home country of Canada. It was very important to us to exercise this right, and so after being together for five years, we got married at the end of 2015.

A HOLIDAY WINTER WEDDING

We were living in Ontario when we planned our wedding, and we decided to get married at home in Vancouver in the winter. We knew that the holidays would bring a lot of our family and friends together, and thought it would be a magical time of year to celebrate our wedding as well! We were married on December 28, 2015 in our home city of Vancouver, in Gastown, our old neighbourhood. Between the hustle and bustle of Christmas and New Years, we brought the most important people in our lives together. Friends and family travelled from all over the world to celebrate our beautiful day. Despite Vancouver being iconically rainy, we miraculously enjoyed a dry and sunny wedding day, and we love to look back on our amazing memories from the occasion.

OUR VENUE

We chose a venue in the Gastown neighbourhood of Vancouver, because it’s where we used to live. It’s the oldest part of the city, with beautiful lamp posts lining it’s cobblestone streets, and it’s full of amazing restaurants, bars, and nightlife. In our opinion, it’s the most gorgeous neighbourhood in Vancouver, and it will always feel special because it’s where we made our first home together. After visiting a few venues that didn’t quite suit us, we found The Diamond, a gorgeous cocktail bar on the second floor of an old building in the main square of Gastown. The room had old wooden floors, wood tables, and great ambiance. Gorgeous brick walls lay between windows looking over the city, with white twinkle lights strung through the branches of the trees outside. It was small, intimate, and perfect for us.

OUR CEREMONY & RECEPTION

Neither of us wanted to get married in a church, or have our wedding reception in a banquet hall. We wanted a venue where we could do everything in one place, and keep things small, personal, and less formal. The Diamond was the perfect venue for us, and we used it for both our ceremony and reception. We got ready separately in the morning on our wedding day, and did our “first look” and formal photos in the afternoon. We had our ceremony in the early evening, and it was immediately followed by a casual cocktail hour and dinner reception. The staff at The Diamond did a beautiful job transforming the room from an intimate ceremony, to a fun reception. They had a small hidden bar just off their main room, where our guests mingled while the room was changed over. Our ceremony was quite casual, and was officiated by the incredible Karen Ell. We walked ourselves down separate aisles on the perimeter of the room, and read our own personal vows to one another. Our reception was emceed by our hilarious friend Flick Penman, and included a taco buffet, a vegan ice cream bar, and an awesome dance party to a self-curated playlist! We definitely did things in a way that suited us, and we couldn’t be happier with the way it all worked out.

TWO BRIDAL GOWNS

We both chose to wear wedding dresses, and it was important to us that our gowns suited us individually, but also complemented one another. We both knew that we didn’t want to wear white, and we also knew that we likely weren’t going to find what we were looking for in a bridal shop. We decided to have our dresses custom made by Vancouver designer Nicole Guzzo, and she did an amazing job bringing our visions to life. Steph decided on a stone blue colour, while I wanted something gold, and these colours helped shape all of our decor themes and even our wedding cake. Both of our dresses ending up suiting us beautifully, and they also looked really wonderful as a pair. We kept our accessories simple, and wore matching sparkly Betsey Johnson heels, and changed into matching gold Keds for our reception. We picked everything out together and saw each other in all of the fittings rather than keeping it a surprise, but that didn’t take away from the magic of seeing one another in our dresses on the wedding day.

OUR BRIDAL PARTY

We didn’t stick to any rules or traditions when we planned our wedding, and so we organized our bridal party in a way that worked best for us. We decided not to have a flower girl or a ring bearer. We also decided not to have a maid of honour or a best man. Our wedding party consisted of four brides ladies and two brides men! It was important to us to have our closest friends and family members in our bridal party, and so we had a mix of women and men. We didn’t stick to the confines of what is typically normal, but it meant that we had the people who were most special to us by our sides on our wedding day.

HAIR & MAKEUP

We took on a lot of things ourselves when it came to our wedding, but one thing that we didn’t want to do ourselves on the big day was hair and makeup. We had the wonderful Vancouver makeup artist Faye Smith and her team do our hair and makeup, as well as our brides ladies, and our moms. It was important to us that everyone feel comfortable and confident, and we kept all of the looks polished, but not too formal. Steph and I both had braids incorporated into our hair styles, and were sure to have our makeup complement one another. We’re so happy with the way that everything came together.

OUR WEDDING HOTEL

We chose The Victorian Hotel in Vancouver to stay at on our wedding night, and we also used it as our location to get ready before the ceremony, as well as take some of our bridal photos. It’s a beautiful, old boutique hotel that has been completely renovated, and it suited us perfectly. The manager was also lovely enough to give room discounts to our friends and family, and a lot of our wedding guests stayed there as well. The manager also offered us a great rate when we went back to celebrate our 1st wedding anniversary in 2016.

CAKE & DECOR

Our magical winter wedding was made complete with some beautiful, simple decor. We decided not to use any fresh flower arrangements, but chose pieces that added a little festive warmth to the venue. We covered the room in candles, decorated the tables with gorgeous lanterns and winter branches, and added only small touches where we wanted, as The Diamond was already so gorgeous! Our vegan cake was actually baked and decorated by Steph (have I mentioned how many incredible hidden talents she has?), and sat on a custom made wooden cake stand. We found a lot of our smaller decor pieces from Etsy, and personalized everything the way we wanted, like ordering a Mrs & Mrs sign for our chairs. We also made a lot of decor ourselves including table place cards featuring our favourite Broadway musicals (yes, we’re nerds!), and a framed seating chart using extra fabric from Steph’s gown. Rather than having a guest book, we made a photo guest board, and had everyone take polaroids to pin on the board with a message written on the back. We had a lot of fun getting crafty and organizing the decor ourselves!

OUR RINGS

When Steph proposed on the sidewalk in NYC, she proposed with a place holder ring, and told me that she wanted me to pick out my dream ring when we got home. Every lesbian couple is different, but we both wanted to wear engagement rings. When we got home to Toronto, where we lived at the time, we both picked out beautiful vintage diamond rings on Etsy. I wanted something simple and classic, and I chose a traditional solitaire diamond with a white gold band. Steph wanted something more intricate, and she chose a three stone setting with round cut diamonds and a white gold band. For our wedding, we each chose different bands that would suit our engagement rings, and exchanged them during our ceremony. A lot of same-sex couples don’t wear wedding rings, and we don’t wear ours all of the time. But to us, they are a powerful symbol of our love and commitment, and we are so happy to have them.

OUR WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER

We were picky when it came to a lot of our vendors, and for that reason many of the people we hired were people that we already knew. Our amazing photographer Sara Rogers, was one of them. We knew that we wanted somebody who would make our friends and family members feel at ease throughout the day, but also someone who would capture our wedding in a way that truly suited us. Not only did Sara do a fantastic job of capturing our ceremony and reception, she also planned the perfect locations to take our bridal portraits including the busy Gastown square, and the roof of a downtown parking garage (seriously amazing). We are so incredibly happy that we placed the utmost importance on finding the perfect photographer, because we absolutely love our wedding photos. They are the perfect capture of the most beautiful day, and years later they are still incredible to look at.

Did anyone else get married around the holidays!? Let us know in the comments what time of year you got married, or what time of year you’re planning to have your wedding!